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The Updated 86 Rules of Boozing (V.2)
Rule 3: If you ever need a reason to drink, remember that you’re alive and going to die.
Rule 16: If your hangover seems fun, you’re still drunk.
Rule 21: Better a good time you can’t remember than a dull one you can.
Rule 13: Life is not too short for cheap whiskey.
Rule 18: Being drunk is remembering who you are.
Rule 26: The distance between “Impossible!” and “All we need is a free weekend and some kind of rocket motor” is eight drinks.
Rule 33: The only thing that tastes better than free liquor is stolen liquor.
Rule 35: Learn to appreciate hangovers. If it were all good times every jackass would be doing it.
Rule 40: Be aloof when sober and jovial when drunk and few will stand in the way of your boozing.
Rule 41: Anyone on stage or behind a bar is 50% better looking.
Rule 45: It’s okay to drink alone.
Rule 51: If you don’t have a Plan B, add more booze to Plan A.
Rule 63: Don’t blame the booze.
Rule 64: Never trust a teetotaler.
Rule 82: There’s nothing wrong with drinking before noon.
Rule 86: It’s not the last drink of the night, it’s the first drink of the rest of your life.
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